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Alasha, referred to lovingly as The Dating Mechani... Read more


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You may feel a little pressure here! Love addict Part 4
07/26/12

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You may feel a little pressure here!

 

It takes little effort to rattle off a list of reasons why it would be enjoyable to have a partner.  In fact if I timed you at 60 seconds I’m positive you could come up with at least 15 benefits of having a partner in your life right now.

That is great!

Now think of that list again. How many of those benefits only touch the surface of what a relationship should consist of?

A vital part of dating is taking the time to understand why you have chosen to date at this stage of your life. Knowing your intent for dating and where you stand in each area of the dating process will decide how you start a relationship and why it ends or continues.

Today let’s explore the Dependent love addict…

Dependent

Those who are dependent on love manipulate others in order to get them to have feelings for them. Out of fear of partners leaving them, verbal or physical abuse may follow. Their focus is not so much on keeping the relationship going but holding on to the power it signifies.

Dependents feel they are not good enough to be loved. They get what they need in the relationship and do not reciprocate. They repeatedly hurt those who are closest to them and instead of taking responsibility they try to defend what they are doing in order to keep that person around.

For fear of the loss of the relationship with a dependent their partners tip toe around issues that bring up red flags or concerns.

Did you identify with any characteristics of the Dependent Love addict?

Here are some tools to take control of this destructive pattern and create some positive dating habits.

1. Take a minute to survey your intentions when deciding to go out on a date.

2. Concentrate on ways to engage in healthy relationships where your motivation is not to misuse others for your pleasures.

3. Make a commitment to yourself to get an accountability partner who is committed to helping you achieve self love and remember that change takes time.

Join me tomorrow to uncover the 5th and last type of love addict. You’ll be surprised


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3 Responses to this article

sutter health jobs July 17, 2013 Reply

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alashabennett July 19, 2013 Reply

Hi there,
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Alasha

Cornelius January 25, 2013 Reply

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